Now, you need to understand one thing. I’ve absolutely no idea what it is to date a cyclist as a non-cyclist, mostly because I’m not dating a cyclist, and I’m definitely not a non-cyclist. But I do have an expert of sorts right here at home, so with her help, let’s talk about the good and the bad things about dating a cyclist.
Dating a non-cyclist! How did that happen?
Love works in mysterious ways, you know. As much as any of us wants, cycling 24/7 is practically impossible if you are not a pro. I mean, we do have to earn the money we so relentlessly spend on bikes. And sometimes, we tend to find love precisely at our workplace. It starts with being late together, going for a prolonged lunch, and after that – a dinner or two. They are impressed that you are riding to work and not shying away from telling your stories.
Still, once you’re dating, the magic of cycling quickly subsides to the harsh reality that they are living with a cyclist now. And that’s definitely not for the faint of heart.
The bad
Let’s be honest. We are not making it easy to love us. Finding another cyclist may be the best option but, well, love works in mysterious ways. Still, there are a few things that a non-cyclist should definitely consider before they get engaged with a cyclist. At least, my fiancée thinks so. Here are her top 5 bad experiences about sharing her life with me.
1. You spend too much time with your bike
Now, this one came out of nowhere. By all means, I’m spending too little time with my bike. I mean, if 68 hours a week is too much… No, I’m just kidding. I do spend a lot of time on the bike. It’s not just about riding. There are always repairs, cleaning, changing parts, tuning, and the occasional romantic dinner. However, my bike prefers lube to anything else and I’ve been told this stuff is not great for my liver.
Plus, it doesn’t help that my jump-to topic is, you guessed it, cycling. I can talk for hours and I’m sure she’s not as interested in what I have to say. Just take the hint and talk about something more interesting instead – politics, perhaps. So, if you want to be better than the average stereotypical cyclist, just, you know, find some time to share this with your significant other.
2. You spend too much on the bike
Having a dedicated bike section in my personal budget should have been a dead giveaway. Still, I don’t think that a third of my monthly income is too much. In all seriousness, cycling is an expensive sport. It takes a lot of research and a lot of money to get a decent bike and gear. So, be sure to prepare your future partner for what’s to come. Of course, not on the first date. But once things get serious, try to ease them in what you spend your money on.
3. Forget about weekend plans
If the weather is fine, you are cycling. That’s a constant. There are no ifs or buts. So, naturally, weekends are all off-limits for dating and prolonged getaways to a romantic place. That’s especially true during summer when the season is at large. Well, sometimes you do go on a getaway. With your bike. And your buddies.
And if they think they can sneak a fast date after the ride – guess again. Usually, after a long ride, you are tired and all you want is to lay back and relax. You don’t want to go to a restaurant, a cinema, a concert or an opera. You want some peace and quiet. Well, when you’re dating a non-cyclist, make sure to also consider their needs. Make sure they get enough weekends with you during any season. Initiate some romantic getaways and leave the bike at home. I know, I know, you’ll be riding again next week. You won’t lose your form if you skip a ride or two. Plus, I’m sure you will think of other ways to have fun even without the bike.
4. I’m constantly worried about you when you ride
That’s the worst thing about dating a non-cyclist. They don’t have first-hand knowledge of what it is to ride a bike. Sure, it looks dangerous and if you’re not careful, it is. And, of course, showing them how Vingegaard flies off a corner, shattering his collarbone and several ribs, is not helping your cause. So, no matter how much you assure them you are safe, they will always worry. They will always want you to write or call them during the ride.
So, make sure to do so during the breaks. It’s the least you can do. Unfortunately, there is not much else you can do. Your partner won’t stop worrying even if you go out cycling in knight armour.
5. You wake me up way too early for your rides
Waking up at 4:30 in the morning is perfectly normal if you are going out for a long ride, especially if it’s a race day. Still, that’s not a normal hour for any sane person to wake up, especially during the weekend. But, unfortunately, you can’t just force yourself to wake up at the precise time. You need an alarm and your spouse will inevitably hear it and wake up. Now, this won’t be a huge problem if they can just turn and go back to sleep. But when you start moving around, dressing, preparing breakfast, and fixing your gear on the bike, going back to sleep for your significant other may be tougher than you think.
Now, this should come without saying but you need to be more considerate. Prepare your stuff ahead of time and be as quiet as possible when you wake up. Don’t move around like an elephant in a glass store. Try to wake up, get dressed, and leave the house as fast as you can so your significant other can go back to their well-deserved sleep.
The good
Reading all of the above may make you wonder why the hell anyone would want to be with you. Well, don’t be so hard on yourself. There are always good things as well. So, to match the bad, here are my fiancée’s top 5 reasons she loves my hobby.
1. You’re definitely not cheating
With a hobby like cycling, there is no chance you’re cheating on your significant other. More importantly, they know it. In my partner’s words, “You won’t miss the chance to ride your bike for something as stupid as a hookup.” And she’s absolutely right. I’m tearing up how well she knows me.
Moreover, my Lycra kit is not the most date-friendly clothing I own. Imagine going to a brunch with my cycling gear and bike, clapping around with my cycling shoes. Yeah, not happening. Plus, she knows that when I’m looking at other cyclists, I’m looking at their bikes, not their… you know. So, yes. Your partner has peace of mind that you are doing precisely what you told them you were doing – not drinking, not gambling, not cheating.
2. I have a lot of time for my hobbies
Cycling is not the only hobby in the world, as you might have suspected. So, even though your partner is not stuck to the seat, that doesn’t mean they are bored out of their mind while you’re cycling. They have all the time in the world to pursue their own hobbies. And you being absent for hours every couple of days or so gives them plenty of time to have plenty of hobbies.
3. You’re fit
Yep. With all the office jobs today, finding someone who’s not breathing heavily after taking the stairs for a couple of floors is a needle in a haystack. But you are going above and beyond. Actually, you are well above average, even if you are slightly husky. You have the lungs to climb anything, the focus to walk for miles, and the experience to just keep going. So once you get to Rome, you will never say, “Can’t we just grab a pizza and an ice cream.”
Most importantly, you stimulate your partner to do outdoor activities as well. Climbing a mountain, running in the park or just fast walking around the neighbourhood. In short, you are good for your partner’s health.
4. Finding you a gift is easy
Your partner has it all figured out. Christmas: a cycling jersey; birthday: new pedals; anniversary: these cool new grips you won’t shut up about. And if you think that they don’t know what to get you, remember how you always talk about cycling. Yeah, they are listening. Most of the time. So, they know what you need, they know where to get it, and they know who to talk to to find out the details (i.e., your cycling buddies). So, my friend, you have the short end of the stick. You need to figure out what to get them to make them at least as happy as they will make you.
5. I finally understand the Tour de France
Not only the Tour de France but all Grand Tours. After all, when you watch something for 4-5 hours every day for a month, it’s helpful to explain everything to your partner about tactics, symbols, trivia, and whatnot.
Finding out about a new sport is always exciting, especially when you start seeing what the damn fuss is all about.
The downside is that your partner may start cheering for a different rider than your favourite, but that’s all part of the fun.
Try to make it a bit easier to date you
Dating a cyclist is definitely not easy. There are quite a few hurdles any potential partner has to jump over. But you can always make it easier. Consider the good and the bad, try to enhance the former, and downplay the latter. Love works in mysterious ways and though we try, we can’t choose whom we fall in love with. So, be yourself; that’s who they fell in love with but try to tone your obsession down at least a little. It will make loving you much easier.
