The emotional connection of shared rides
The wonderful thing about cycling with someone is that you’re not just hanging out and talking, you’re experiencing, overcoming, and enjoying side by side. And that’s why cycling has so much potential when it comes to quality time for couples.
On a ride, you’re exposed to the same challenges, weather, terrain, fatigue and pain, and unexpected mechanical issues. These shared experiences create emotional bonds because you’re facing and dealing with obstacles together.
And as much as there are hardships in cycling, there are even more joyful and positive moments. Cycling makes you more relaxed, endorphins are flowing, and you tend to open up in a way you might not sitting across from each other at a dinner table. Don’t just do café rides together, do some challenging routes or those that offer plenty of opportunities to ride side by side and talk. That’s how you get the most out of cycling.
Creating your own rituals and traditions around cycling
One of my favourite things about cycling with my girlfriend is that we came up with so many cycling-related rituals and traditions. It’s now a part of our relationship and makes it richer. There’s no manual on what these should be, but here are a few examples from my experience to get you inspired.
Exploring a new café on a weekend ride at least once a month. Will we ever run out of new cafés? Let’s see.
Celebrating with a high-five on top of every big climb. The climbs that warrant a high-five have gotten steeper over time, but we still keep it up.
Taking a “bike selfie” together almost every ride and building an album over the years. Sometimes we do a short video while riding, too. It’s actually nice to look back.
Going on a Christmas Eve bike ride together, no matter the weather. With the winters getting milder, it’s not even a big challenge, but it’s something fun to look forward to.
Watching our beloved cycling races together and making fun of the live commentary. Except for Matt Stephens, he’s the best and our favourite.
Giving each other Kudos on Strava after every ride. Because what if none of your four friends log in that day?
Planning rides together
One of the most important ingredients for making cycling quality time is planning rides together. It’s easy for a ride to go wrong if one person is itching for a hard training session while the other is hoping for a casual scenic cruise. Good planning means you both answer the following two questions:
- What’s the goal today? (Trying for a Strava segment, building fitness, recovery, exploration?)
- Are there any non-negotiables? (A favourite coffee stop, avoiding heavy traffic, avoiding a killer climb…)
Planning rides with both answers in mind shows mutual respect and ensures the ride feels like a shared experience, not a competition or compromise.
Communication on the bike
Good communication while riding builds habits of clarity, kindness, and responsiveness that transfer into life off the bike. That’s because on the bike, there are more immediate consequences to poor communication. Imagine if you don’t pick up on your partner’s building fatigue, and you find yourself with a fully depleted companion far away from home. Sometimes, you can go slow and enjoy a casual conversation, but other times, you need to check in and quickly exchange important information while fatigued physically and mentally.
Learning to communicate well on the bike, without criticism, impatience or over-explaining, strengthens trust. It teaches you how to actively listen and stay tuned in to each other’s needs even when no words are spoken.
Quality time cycling together
Cycling together isn’t about riding at the same speed all the time or having perfectly planned outings. It’s about sharing the ride, the good days, the hard ones, and everything in between. With a little intention, a bit of humour, and a willingness to adapt, you can turn your time in the saddle into some of the most rewarding moments of your relationship. So, plan that ride, celebrate the small wins, and don’t forget to hand out those Strava kudos.
