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World’s Worst Cycle Lanes

By Jessica Lamb

Some cycle lanes save lives, others are shrines to stupidity. From paths owned by trees, to those clearly leading to another dimension, the world is full of brainlessly built cycle lanes, testing cycling skills to the max on the simplest of commutes. None though beat these bad boys. Behold, the world’s worst cycle lanes.

The Psyclopath, Montreal

In Montreal’s Parc des Marchand de Bois is exactly what would happen if a nine-year-old with a crayon designed a cycle path. Amazingly, it’s the only lane on this page that’s actually a joke.

The Gutter, Vancouver

Vancouver’s Knight Street Bridge over the Fraser River has been branded Canada’s most dangerous road, and not just for cyclists. Brilliant news then is that the road authority put a lot of thought into keeping vulnerable road users safe by installing this pedestrian and cycle lane.

Thankfully, the recent installation of a new railway bridge further up the river came with a pedestrian-cycle only skyway. At least part of the city’s cyclists can avoid this gutter lane.

The Slalom, Belfast

A fine example of Northern Ireland’s cycleways comes at the entrance to Belfast’s docks, where nobody is quite sure what came first; the signs – and tree – or the cycle lane. It’s an official section of the National Cycle Network.

Photo: Warrington Cycle Campaign

Take The Hint, Bucarest

People don’t cycle much in Bucarest.

Photo: Stuff Dutch People Like

The Challenge, Volendam

Finally, a cycle lane that begs to be taken on. Squeezed onto the edge of a canal in Volendam, Holland, this is the famous stretch of bike path that infamous French high-wire artist Philippe Petit used to hone his skills, before attempting the daring walk that has been Hollywooded in the film The Walk.

Photo: Stuff Dutch People Like

Yes, that’s rubbish, but it’s likely this path is too. Though little evidence is available, word is the white bikes were painted by a humorous soul and have since been removed. No figures documenting how many cyclists completed the ride have been released.

The Game Of Chicken, London

Here, on Tavistock Place in Camden, London, town planners support local A&E departments by directing cyclists into head-on collisions.

The What? Essex

This mind-boggling example of a cycle path is brought to you by the Essex County Council. In an insane bid to create the safest possible environment for pedestrians in Harlow, cyclists are ordered to dismount seven times in 380 yards. To date no cyclist has managed the feat, but we hear cyclocross legend Sven Nys is looking forward to his go.

Photo: Warrington Cycle Campaign

The Viewing Point, Suffolk

For the natural end of a ride is not always clear. On Stowupland Road in Suffolk, UK, that tricky decision has been made simpler by this cycle path. It offers a perfect opportunity to take a sip, drink in the drone from the motorway and wonder what it’s like on the other side of the bridge.

Common sense has prevailed since this shot was taken and you can now turn left, cross the road and continue cycling across the bridge to the new world.

Do you know any ridiculous cycling lanes in your city? Please share them in the comments below or on our Facebook.