{"id":8789,"date":"2025-11-05T10:00:51","date_gmt":"2025-11-05T09:00:51","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.welovecycling.com\/uk\/?p=8789"},"modified":"2025-11-10T10:04:09","modified_gmt":"2025-11-10T09:04:09","slug":"when-your-riding-buddy-said-i-wont-bring-mine-if-you-dont-and-then-absolutely-did","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.welovecycling.com\/uk\/2025\/11\/05\/when-your-riding-buddy-said-i-wont-bring-mine-if-you-dont-and-then-absolutely-did\/","title":{"rendered":"When Your Riding Buddy Said \u201cI Won\u2019t Bring Mine If You Don\u2019t\u201d and Then Absolutely Did"},"content":{"rendered":"

Cycling is built on trust. You trust your brakes. You trust your drivetrain. You trust that when your friend says, \u201cDon\u2019t worry, I won\u2019t bring mudguards if you don\u2019t,\u201d they mean it.<\/strong><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

But they didn\u2019t mean it. They lied. And now your face smells like their rear tyre.<\/p>\n

This is a story about betrayal, friendship, and that one guy who showed up with full coverage and a smug smile.<\/p>\n

The pact is sacred<\/strong><\/h2>\n

You\u2019ve both checked the forecast.
\nRain: possible<\/em>. Roads: definitely wet<\/em>. The question arises: mudguards?<\/p>\n

You open the conversation like a diplomat. Casual. Innocent. \u201cYou bringing guards tomorrow?\u201d<\/p>\n

They say, \u201cOnly if you are.\u201d
\nYou say, \u201cNah, couldn\u2019t be bothered.\u201d
\nThey say, \u201cSame. Let\u2019s live a little.\u201d<\/p>\n

You fist-bump in solidarity. You imagine the damp but honourable ride ahead.<\/p>\n

What you don\u2019t imagine is the crusty hell awaiting your chamois region.<\/p>\n

The betrayal reveals itself gradually<\/strong><\/h2>\n

You meet at the usual spot. You\u2019re both smiling.
\nThen you see it.
\nPeeking out beneath their saddle: a rear mudguard<\/em>. Full-length. Matte black. Suspiciously clean.<\/p>\n

You stare at it like it insulted your mother.
\nThey act like it\u2019s always<\/em> been there.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh yeah, I chucked it on just in case,\u201d they say.
\nJust in case you<\/em> got soaked, presumably.<\/p>\n

The ride becomes a psychological thriller<\/strong><\/h2>\n

You spend the entire ride directly behind their wheel, because you\u2019re not strong enough to drop them and too proud to say anything.<\/p>\n

Their rear tyre becomes a fountain of filth.
\nYou are now wearing most of the road.
\nYour face tastes like worm juice.
\nYour down tube cries softly with every rotation.<\/p>\n

They? Bone dry.
\nNot even a speck on their pristine overshoes.<\/p>\n

They say things like:
\n\u201cWow, these roads are mucky today.\u201d
\n\u201cHope your drivetrain\u2019s okay.\u201d
\n\u201cI forgot how wet it gets without guards!\u201d<\/p>\n

You say nothing. You are planning a revenge arc.<\/p>\n

Post-ride consequences<\/strong><\/h2>\n

You get home.
\nYour bibs are stained.
\nYour jacket smells like agriculture.
\nYour socks are a crime scene.<\/p>\n

You peel off your layers with the emotional fragility of someone who\u2019s seen things. SPLASHY<\/em> things.<\/p>\n

They, meanwhile, upload the ride to Strava with the caption: \u201cGreat autumn spin! Dry enough, surprisingly.\u201d<\/p>\n

Dry enough.<\/strong> SURPRISINGLY.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Options for retaliation<\/strong><\/h2>\n

Adjust their saddle by 1mm every week until they file a warranty claim.
\nCasually compliment their bike, then add, \u201cI didn\u2019t know they still made that groupset.\u201d
\nSign them up for Zwift<\/a> races under the name \u201cDampRider69\u201d<\/strong>.
\nPut a banana in their bottle cage. Not a wrapped one. A raw one. Just see what happens.
\nSay \u201cwhat\u2019s that clicking sound?\u201d every ten minutes. Even when there isn\u2019t one.
\nPhotoshop them onto a full-sus mountain bike and upload it as their Strava profile photo.
\nGift them a rear fender that says \u201cI ruin friendships\u201d<\/em> in Comic Sans.<\/p>\n

Or just… quietly switch to your own full-length guards next time.<\/p>\n

But never forget.
\nNever trust again.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Cycling is built on trust. You trust your brakes. You trust your drivetrain. 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