1. My bike is the most important thing in my life. Even more important than my parents.
2. The best Christmas present for my ex-girlfriend was a new pair of quick release pedals.
3. Look at the guy with hairy legs! I totally shave my legs every day.
4. Really? I would never have guessed you were a cyclist.
5. I’m probably infertile because of my saddle.
6. How much do your socks smell after a day-long ride?
7. Can you blow your nose like a real cyclist?
8. According to Facebook, you rode with another guy last weekend.
9. I hit a Bambi deer on my last ride and it died in horrible pain.
10. My ex was an endurance cyclist who rode two hundred kilometers per day without a problem.
11. I bet you are in a really good shape. How much do you weigh? And how much does your bike weigh? Is it carbon fiber?
12. Let’s have a race! (And then laugh at how slow she is).
13. Sorry for the sweat, I was pedaling hard for 40 minutes to arrive on time. Do you smell that?
14. Look at my personal performances on Strava. What about yours? Let’s compare them!
15. Does it hurt down there when you spend a day in the saddle?
16. My therapist tells me that I should really stop talking about cycling.
17. You totally remind me of my friend Steve.
18. I like your thick thighs. Do you ride a lot?
19. Your jersey is similar to my wife’s.
20. Everything ok? You look tired.
21. I’ve never read a book. I spend all my free time in the saddle.
22. It seems to me like you’re not really enjoying this trip.
23. I’m not looking for anything serious – just a pal for cycling.
24. So, are you bi? ‘Cause those glasses and dress are giving you away.
25. Have you ever considered losing a few kilograms?
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